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Season 5 E 24 • 09/10/2014

On their shared birthday, Joy receives three proposals, Victoria's date has two noses, Melanie's has a sex surrogate, and Elka's is very surprising.

Watching

During a thunderstorm, Victoria is stuck with a beach bum, Melanie is irritated by her friend, Joy objects to her mother's fiance, and Elka fears a ghost.

When Elka produces a play about the women, Melanie, Joy and Victoria are livid over how they're portrayed, then meet with their actor counterparts to set them straight.

A dating consultant sabotages Mitch's chances with Joy, Victoria spends time with down-to-earth filmmaker J.J., and Elka has a campaign fundraiser.

Straight Outta Cleveland

Joy and Mitch preemptively see a couples' therapist, and Victoria's son Tony doesn't know how to come out of the closet to her as straight.

Realizing they've never been in Elka's house, Melanie, Joy and Victoria enter it, then find it's a portal to an animated universe and are granted three wishes by Steven Tyler.

As Victoria and J.J. figure out when to sleep together for the first time, Joy moderates a debate between Elka and Councilman Powell, which turns into a vodka shot contest.

Melanie is paired with offensively macho radio cohost Frankie, Joy and Elka fail their final exams, and J.J.'s children find Victoria reminiscent of their late mother.

Mystery Date: Oscar Edition

With the Academy Awards three weeks away, Victoria asks Elka to draft her Oscar acceptance speech, and Melanie and Joy fiercely compete to be Victoria's plus one.

Melanie fights with her mother, Elka uses any tactic she can to get elected, Victoria skips attending the Oscars in case she loses, and Joy has a wardrobe malfunction.

Simon returns and covertly tries to win Joy back, Victoria looks forward to receiving her Oscar statue, and Councilwoman Elka takes on a Godfather persona.

On their shared birthday, Joy receives three proposals, Victoria's date has two noses, Melanie's has a sex surrogate, and Elka's is very surprising.

When Joy chooses to marry Simon, Melanie breaks the news to Bob and has pity sex with him, as Victoria goes to New York for a role after being told it's opposite Brad Pitt.

Fear and Loathing in Los Angeles

A trip to L.A. reaffirms Melanie, Joy and Victoria's experience that it is a shallow, youth-obsessed city, and Elka pitches Mario Lopez on shooting "Extra" in Cleveland.

Elka goes after a silver fox, Melanie gets trapped in her closet with Frankie, and Victoria ditches Joy as her lifestyle website sidekick.

Melanie thinks their neighbor Jack saw her naked, Joy joins a casual sex app, Victoria doesn't understand the plot of her own series, and Elka needs a council member's vote.

To do research on detectives for her HBO show, Victoria tags along with Joy and Bob on a stakeout, and Elka reluctantly partners with Melanie for a secret word tournament.

After taking turns talking behind each other's backs, Melanie, Joy and Victoria get into each other's heads, and Elka starts sleeping with the mayor.

Cold In Cleveland: The Christmas Episode

Victoria asks her ex Ernie Hudson not to allow their 70s Christmas movie to re-air, Melanie goes all out with holiday lights, and Joy spars with an older British woman.

The Young and the Restless

Joy tries to talk Melanie's daughter into going to Harvard Medical School, Victoria is blackmailed by her show's editor Barney, and Elka mentors a nerdy kid.

To get a part on her HBO show, Victoria's father lies to her and says he's dying, and Melanie takes Frankie's advice in how to break up with clingy Jack.

Joy's frumpy sister Jill becomes a knockout, Victoria and Melanie collaborate on a children's book with a tight deadline, and Elka welcomes an earl and his dignitaries.

01/21/2015