Life With Lucci Sneak Peek

  • Season 3
  • Aired

Melanie prepares for a Woman's Day seminar and Victoria's arch nemesis Susan Lucci arrives.

I'VE HAD THE WORST DAY.

- SORRY,BUT IF YOU WANT TO VENT,

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO TAKEA NUMBER AND WAIT YOUR TURN.

- I'VE BEEN BIKINI SHOPPING.

- ALONE?- OH, DEAR GOD!

HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?

- BIKINI SHOPPINGIS A MINEFIELD.

ONE WRONG THONGAND YOU'RE A SUMO WRESTLER.

- ONE WRONG TOPAND YOU'RE A TEN-YEAR-OLD BOY.

- ONE WRONGBATHING SUIT SKIRT

AND YOU'RE THE HIPPOFROM FANTASIA.

- WHY TORTURE YOURSELF NOW?SUMMER'S MONTHS AWAY.

- I'M GOINGTO BERMUDA NEXT WEEK.

WOMAN'S DAY MAGAZINEASKED ME TO SPEAK AT A SEMINAR,

AND THEY'RE HAVING IT AT THISFABULOUS HOTEL ON THE BEACH.

- WOMEN ONLY?OH, DEAR.

MEN NEVER LOOK PAST LEGSAND CLEAVAGE, BUT WOMEN...

- OH, YOU'LL BE JUDGEDMERCILESSLY.

I'M JUDGING YOU RIGHT NOW.

- I KNOW.

THAT'S WHY I NARROWED IT DOWNTO THREE SUITS.

IF I CAN LOSE ENOUGH WEIGHTTO FIT INTO THIS,

THEY'LL SAY,"SHE LOOKS GREAT."

BUT IF I CAN STARVE MYSELFINTO THIS, THEY'LL SAY,

"HAS SHE HAD WORK DONE?"

BUT IF I CAN DEHYDRATE MYSELFINTO THIS, THEY'LL SAY,

"OH, MY GOD,I HATE HER."

I JUST WANT THEMTO HATE ME SO MUCH.

[doorbell rings]

- OH, WHAT A SURPRISE.FLOWERS.

- VICTORIA, DID YOU SENDYOURSELF FLOWERS AGAIN?

- YES. I HAD TO.

I WAS THAT UPSETABOUT THAT SCRIPT.

- ACTUALLY,THEY'RE FROM ME.

- WAIT,I KNOW THAT VOICE.

[gasps]

- HELLO, VICTORIA.

- LUCCI!

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